annette's Journal
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November 22, 2008
busy working
Iv'e been busy working alot lately, tring to get back into the swing of helping others I have landed a good job working with a group that helps the mentaly challanged live on there own, Iam unable to find anyplace that just deals with H.D. clients in my area .I have thought long and hard and feel in my heart this is where I belong helping others,it feels so much better than just worring about why a am healthy there are alot of people out in the world that are not and i seem to have a nack (my freinds say gift) for it . I do not spend that mush time online any more, I will keep looking for my brothers son I have had no luck it seems i will have to make a trip to new york, I know he is out there i just seem to be one step behind him.
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August 07, 2008
my fathers fears
It hasbeen going on almost two years since my brother got to sick to eat, then passed away.All my father complains on how Idon't call him enough,why don't you come see me. I don't like speaking to the man, he never did see the big picture of how H.D. tore our family apart.
Anyway, I spoke with him just last week the usual, small talk Ihave been asking the man for two years now, please find joe' son , so we can take his ashe's out to sea like we had agreed on. It was like i was asking him to shit gold ( I wasn't involved in how he got dead and burned) he says to me, well you know what no one asked him , and when it came time to handle my brother's stuff everyone was so quick to let me fit the bill. Everyone thought that well i would hand over the ashes if they asked, my dad included( why don't you bury joe's ashes with me in the cemetary when i die) you don't call much anymore he always says.
the last time I spoke to my dad he wanted to know my blood type, for what Iasked him, in case I need a blood transfusion. I live 15 hours from the man by car, can't just catch a plane, that isn't even what got me he got mad because i didn't mach his, i said ask my sister see lives close by.' I can"t take blood from her she is acting sick like your mother, her blood is no good I might get what your mother had' Iwanted to say you stupid self # * # ***** instead good bye talk to you later i mumbled to him and hung up the phone.